Blog Archives

Social Media tips

When I was away in Mexico I took an opportunity to “unplug” from the Internet and Social Media sites. It was SO refreshing!

We talked in class about creating boundaries for your life so that, for example, you don’t always answer the phone every time it rings – instead you let it go to answer phone and this gives you time to listen to the message and work out how you will respond appropriately. This may be by calling the person back or sending them a quick email but it means you are not so reactive all the time. I LOVED this! Sometimes the sound of my mobile ringing fills me with dread. “What now?” I think. “What more do people want from me?” Now I can check my mobile a few times a day and form a proper response to people rather than being so reactive and negative! So, in the future, don’t expect to speak to me every time you call, leave your request and expect an email response…

The other great boundary was to limit internet and social media time each day and never NEVER look at these sites before going to bed! Try to use your Facebook as a way to send messages out to friends and colleagues (and, for me, clients) but try to limit the time spent looking at photographs of old boyfriends or schoolfriends who are your Facebook friend but would walk across the street to avoid speaking to you in real life! Social media inevitably leads to social comparison for me. “Look how well he is doing. He was SO stupid at school and now he has that great job.” I think. “Look at her lovely children. I must be a complete disaster because I forgot to have any.”

Today I received a note from the Brave Girls Club and I thought it was so helpful to get me out of this continuous social comparison.

Dear Important Girl,

Chances are, there’s a part of your heart that feels weary because of all of the things you have read, seen and heard about that are going on in other people’s lives that you know, and even that you don’t know.

We now live in a world of soundbites, dear friend. We seem to only see millions of little sentences telling about the highlights and a-has and victories and vacations and love affairs and awards and latest purchases and latest creations, when we still have the rest of the humdrum details of our own lives to live. It seems as if we might be the only one who is living a tedious reality. (but what is true?)

Friend, beautiful beautiful friend — please do yourself a great act of kindness and do an outside detox and just go inward. Take a look at your own beautiful life, your own beautiful soul, your own beautiful family, your own beautiful blessings, your own beautiful memories, your own beautiful dreams, your own beautiful self. Get back in touch with YOU. Take a few days this weekend and give yourself permission to unplug from the over-stimulation and just sit in the peace of your own life. YOUR LIFE IS ENOUGH. YOU ARE ENOUGH. YOU DO ENOUGH. YOU HAVE ENOUGH. YOU ARE LOVED ENOUGH. YOU ARE AMAZING ENOUGH.

Take a break, ok?
Be good to you. Please don’t punish yourself with so much outside information and comparing. Have a little detox. You will see the truth of just how wonderful your life really is.


Try it yourself and see what you think…

Victoria X

The REAL meaning of yoga

I was reading a blog post from eminent yogis and meditators Ed & Deb Shapiro where they say: “Yoga is not just about standing on our head or bending in all sorts of contorted positions. It is the uniting of body, mind, and spirit, encouraging a full experience of the intricate relationship between them and how to bring this relationship into balance. Ultimately, yoga is about self-realization, true freedom, where the individual self merges into the universal self.”

I just had to share this because I really think that we have forgotten the real meaning of yoga in our quest to get better at the physical elements of it. All week I have been teaching a challenging twisted forward bend – Parivrtta Janu Sirsasana – or revolved head to knee pose which was difficult for many of my students. (Have a look at the picture, courtesy of Yoga Journal, and you’ll be able to see why!) This seated forward bend also requires an intense lateral flexion of the spine and a rotation of the spine at the same time. The final posture has the back of the head on the outstretched leg with the torso opening up to the sky as much as possible.

I know it looks impossible and some people want to give up before they attempt it. But, in order to reach that final pose you need to trust and know that if you move slowly, deliberately, with breath and awareness, you will get there in the end. You won’t get there after seeing it once and then forcing your body into submission. (But then that wouldn’t be yoga anyway). I think that a physically and mentally challenging pose like this should be practiced with mindfulness, bringing your complete awareness to your body and breath in order to prevent injury.

For me, the REAL meaning of yoga is to practice the physical postures in order to move beyond the body and even past the mind, into the realm of true ‘union’ with yourself and the divine, or as Ed & Deb say; “where the individual self merges into the universal self.” The only way to do this, in my opinion, is to ensure that your physical practice is led by your breath. And I’ll leave the final words with Ed & Deb: “The breath is the entry point to the body, so watching the flow of the breath brings our attention inward, enabling external distractions to drop away. It focuses our attention and deepens awareness as we do each yoga posture, creating a meditation in action. All we have to do is follow each breath as it enters and leaves, bringing the breath, mind and body together”.


Love, love, LOVE this book!

I’ve been reading Sonja Lyubomirsky’s brilliant The How of Happiness where she outlines the 12 scientifically proven ways we can boost our happiness. Here they are:

     1. Expressing Gratitude
     2. Cultivating Optimism
     3. Avoiding Overthinking and Social Comparison
     4. Practicing Acts of Kindness
     5. Nurturing Social Relationships
     6. Developing Strategies for Coping
     7. Learning to Forgive
     8. Increasing Flow Experiences
     9. Savoring Life’s Joys
     10. Committing to Your Goals
     11. Practicing Religion and Spirituality
     12. Taking Care of Your Bodythrough Meditation, Physical Activity and Acting Like a Happy Person

These points are so simple BUT so effective and the book itself is a great way to introduce mindfulness techniques into your everyday life. It has been described as “both a powerful contribution to the field of positive psychology and a gift to all those who have questioned their own well- being and sought to take their happiness into their own hands”. Another reviewer says, “It packs an incredible amount of science into one book but is written in a way that’s fun to read and not at all overwhelming for non-psychologists”. I really recommend you check it out.


Busy, busy, busy…

I was so busy yesterday interviewing for a new freelance trainer position and preparing for a 2 -hour stress management workshop today that I forgot to post yesterday. I also seemed to forget to sleep! Ironically, delivering a stress management can be very stressful and I was running around at after 1am getting worksheets and handouts in order. Then I was up with the lark to make the long drive to Belturbet, Co. Cavan for my session on ‘Stretch for Stress Relief’ with Me Unltd. It was well worth the journey! The ladies were lovely and fully engaged with all the physical activity and especially with the chocolate meditation…

For those who don’t know what this is, it is a special mindfulness meditation technique where you take around 10 – 20 minutes to eat ONE piece of chocolate. It sounds strange, but by bringing all of your awareness to the sensations that come up in your body when you eat your one piece of chocolate, you find it is the tastiest piece of chocolate you have ever eaten in your life. You also find you are full up after your one little bit and no longer want to devour the entire chocolate aisle at Tescos!

As for those who are wondering how I could deliver a chocolate meditation when I’m on a raw food diet – don’t panic. I had brought strawberries with me as well and I tucked into that. I also tucked into a fabulous salad when I came home. This diet is the easiest thing I’ve ever done and I can’t believe that I didn’t do it sooner!


Workshop Ideas

I’ve had a few ideas for workshops which might be of interest to you…

  1. Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction technique
  2. Core Strength Vinyasa Yoga
  3. Confident Communication
  4. Stretch your skills with Pilates techniques
  5. Stretch your skills with Yoga techniques
  6. Stretch your skills with meditation techniques

Please comment on these so that I can work out what you’d most like to do and can then get organised!